AP Newsflash - Dateline Chicago - April 15, 1992

Visiting Professor Killed

A visiting professor from Texas A&M University in College Station, Texas was killed today in the spectacular collapse of a twenty story building under construction by two of his former CVEN345 students. Killed while inspecting the new construction was Dr. Lee L. Lowery, Jr., visiting the area by invitation of his former students. Speculating on the cause of the collapse, the students commented that it may have been an Act of God, or perhaps a faulty shear and moment diagram. "He never really got that point across," the students commented.

Regarding the investigation by the State Attorney General into the possibility that the collapse was in retaliation for their grades, both students said "Ridiculous! Everybody got an A in Lowery's class."

When asked about future plans for their multi-million dollar construction firm, the students replied that they would probably return to Texas A&M, where failures were not viewed with such alarm. One of the students commented "Damn. You would think it was the only building in town!"